Bovine Lingua

Dear Hair Expert,

I have so-called naturally curly red hair, but all my life I’ve also had a problem with something I refer to as “the badass curl.”  Truthfully, it is a cowlick.  (I do not know the scientific name for cowlick.  Bovine Lingua?)  Anyway, my moo-inducing tendencies are truly problematic while my hair is short.  I get up in the morning, saturate the unruly thing, paste it down with mousse, gel, what have you… but hours later (always after a client has come and gone) I discover the thing standing upright like a teenage privacy issue on a first date.  What gives?  Furthermore, why does my hair always look like a bad dye job?  Dark at the roots and red at the tips.  I’m sick of that.  People must think I’m a lax colorer.  The truth is, I take pride in the fact that I DO NOT COLOR!  I like the grey!  WTF?

Hair Expert, please review the attached photos and feel free to publish your honest opinion.  And note that the Bovine Lingua is so pronounced that it casts a shadow on the wall behind me.  Wowie!

Yours truly,

Cinnamon Swirl